Saturday, April 24, 2004
Why can't I get over my fears. If I wasn't afraid things would be so much easier.
Not saying things can say something too.
Yesterday, before school, I went to the Caf, and Zea was there. I walked over to see that Tori was sitting next to Zea. Zea got up and gave me her seat. I sat down and I was thinking about what to say to Tori. It went along the lines of "Everytime I try to speak to you, I can't". And these words were true, I didn't say them, and in a few minutes Tori got up and went to class...
It is so stupid, I like her, I want to know what she thinks of me. But I don't have the guts to even speak to her. I talk to Zea coz I don't like her, and it is easy to speak to her. I don't speak to Tori because I like her, and I am worried of rejection.
"Fears"
Fear of Rejection
vs
Fear of the Unknown.
The fear of rejection is ruling me at the moment,
but it is the fear of the unknown that is pulling me apart.
When I walk up to her,
that is the fear of the unknown driving me,
when I fail to speak to her,
the fear of rejection caused that.
I wish I could tell her what I am thinking,
but no,
I don't,
and I am regretting it.
I guess the reason is that I don't know what to say to her,
and more importantly,
what she will say to me in return.
If she only knew how much it took for me to just walk up to her,
but then it doesn't matter what I do,
it matters what she is going to do in reaction to my actions"
(8:57pm | 23-04-04)
Also on Deviant Art
Also "Blind Love" is another poem that fits into this type of post...
The thing I want the most at the moment is to know what she thinks of me, but my own fears are stopping me from knowing (lol, thinks of donnie darko). But I still believe that everything will work out eventually, and when the time is right I will speak to her. And if things don't work the way I imagined, then they weren't meant to be. But I am still learning, and to end my post, another few poems. lol, all of these things have made me a writer and a poet :P...
"True love
is it but a fairy tail,
as relationships seem doomed to fail?
No one wants to die alone" (10:53pm | 10-04-04)
"I made her feel safe,
I made her feel happy,
I was everything she wanted at one time.
and now it is over.
I want a girl to want me,
I want her to feel happy because of me,
and because she would be happy,
so would I" (8:40pm | 23-04-04)
///Simmo 11:29am
Not saying things can say something too.
Yesterday, before school, I went to the Caf, and Zea was there. I walked over to see that Tori was sitting next to Zea. Zea got up and gave me her seat. I sat down and I was thinking about what to say to Tori. It went along the lines of "Everytime I try to speak to you, I can't". And these words were true, I didn't say them, and in a few minutes Tori got up and went to class...
It is so stupid, I like her, I want to know what she thinks of me. But I don't have the guts to even speak to her. I talk to Zea coz I don't like her, and it is easy to speak to her. I don't speak to Tori because I like her, and I am worried of rejection.
"Fears"
Fear of Rejection
vs
Fear of the Unknown.
The fear of rejection is ruling me at the moment,
but it is the fear of the unknown that is pulling me apart.
When I walk up to her,
that is the fear of the unknown driving me,
when I fail to speak to her,
the fear of rejection caused that.
I wish I could tell her what I am thinking,
but no,
I don't,
and I am regretting it.
I guess the reason is that I don't know what to say to her,
and more importantly,
what she will say to me in return.
If she only knew how much it took for me to just walk up to her,
but then it doesn't matter what I do,
it matters what she is going to do in reaction to my actions"
(8:57pm | 23-04-04)
Also on Deviant Art
Also "Blind Love" is another poem that fits into this type of post...
The thing I want the most at the moment is to know what she thinks of me, but my own fears are stopping me from knowing (lol, thinks of donnie darko). But I still believe that everything will work out eventually, and when the time is right I will speak to her. And if things don't work the way I imagined, then they weren't meant to be. But I am still learning, and to end my post, another few poems. lol, all of these things have made me a writer and a poet :P...
"True love
is it but a fairy tail,
as relationships seem doomed to fail?
No one wants to die alone" (10:53pm | 10-04-04)
"I made her feel safe,
I made her feel happy,
I was everything she wanted at one time.
and now it is over.
I want a girl to want me,
I want her to feel happy because of me,
and because she would be happy,
so would I" (8:40pm | 23-04-04)
///Simmo 11:29am
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