Thursday, April 29, 2004
Life really is a roller coaster, just when you think that you are starting to be happy, it kicks you in the stomach. I never blame the people, I never blame them. If I blame anyone, it would be me. I can't help but feel cheated, as if the world want's me to be unhappy.
Tori's friends gave her email address to me. And I emailed her last night. I got a reply back today. It was'nt the type of reply I was hoping before. But it is an answer, it is an end.
She never liked me, it was all me. And Since I never talked to her, I never found out she wasnt looking for anyone. I thought of a comment I heard recently, to be fixated on one thing makes you blind to everything else around you. How many other chances have I lost because I had a sily crush on Tori.
I was foolish to think that she would want to go out with me. Noone would ever want me. It was just a fluke that .Tasha liked me, and even then she didnt want me for long. I am useless, someone that is destined to be alone for the rest of his life. Never to experience true love.
If ever there was a time I wanted to cry more, it would be now. But even now only a slight amount of tears are appearing. Scarcely enough to wipe away. Barely enough to stop me from typing.
Shattered once again, this is when someone asks. Is it even worth trying anymore, why go looking for love if you are only going to be knocked down EVERY single time. I know I haven't tried, much. But it isn't a very good start to it all. And I am finding that each time I get knocked down it gets progressively harder to get back up again...
///Simmo
Tori's friends gave her email address to me. And I emailed her last night. I got a reply back today. It was'nt the type of reply I was hoping before. But it is an answer, it is an end.
She never liked me, it was all me. And Since I never talked to her, I never found out she wasnt looking for anyone. I thought of a comment I heard recently, to be fixated on one thing makes you blind to everything else around you. How many other chances have I lost because I had a sily crush on Tori.
I was foolish to think that she would want to go out with me. Noone would ever want me. It was just a fluke that .Tasha liked me, and even then she didnt want me for long. I am useless, someone that is destined to be alone for the rest of his life. Never to experience true love.
If ever there was a time I wanted to cry more, it would be now. But even now only a slight amount of tears are appearing. Scarcely enough to wipe away. Barely enough to stop me from typing.
Shattered once again, this is when someone asks. Is it even worth trying anymore, why go looking for love if you are only going to be knocked down EVERY single time. I know I haven't tried, much. But it isn't a very good start to it all. And I am finding that each time I get knocked down it gets progressively harder to get back up again...
///Simmo
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