Tuesday, April 27, 2004
Another day of tafe, another day of not talking to Tori.
Many people say; "What have I got to loose". But to me it is not that simple. When I try to speak to her, I don't know what to do, even if I think of something to say, the words just don't come out.
I talked to Zea again, she is another one of the people that gives me confidene, she helps me believe that I can. Others believe in me, why don't I?
I don't take many chances, often for good reason. But I want to take this chance. I want to jump into the deep end and not know what will happen next. I want to feel the exhileration of a moment gone out of control. But something in me wants to remian in control. Becuase, at times, that is all that I have. I dont want to live like that, I want to find out what would happen if I just took a chance, just I can't do it now. Not without help.
I find I repeat myself alot, it could be a bad thing. I dont know yet.
It shows that I have centered ideas about what I am feeling, that I know a part of me is scared of taking a chance, but another part is being torn apart fromt this time of inaction. One part of me want to take that chance. Most of me wants to take that chance, but I can't ignore that other part.
There I go again, repeating myself...again
Thats enough repition for today :-) ....
//Simmo
Many people say; "What have I got to loose". But to me it is not that simple. When I try to speak to her, I don't know what to do, even if I think of something to say, the words just don't come out.
I talked to Zea again, she is another one of the people that gives me confidene, she helps me believe that I can. Others believe in me, why don't I?
I don't take many chances, often for good reason. But I want to take this chance. I want to jump into the deep end and not know what will happen next. I want to feel the exhileration of a moment gone out of control. But something in me wants to remian in control. Becuase, at times, that is all that I have. I dont want to live like that, I want to find out what would happen if I just took a chance, just I can't do it now. Not without help.
I find I repeat myself alot, it could be a bad thing. I dont know yet.
It shows that I have centered ideas about what I am feeling, that I know a part of me is scared of taking a chance, but another part is being torn apart fromt this time of inaction. One part of me want to take that chance. Most of me wants to take that chance, but I can't ignore that other part.
There I go again, repeating myself...again
Thats enough repition for today :-) ....
//Simmo
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