Wednesday, March 03, 2004
Lost chances, love lost it seems, and too much time to think about those times...
Is it wrong to still like her? or is it selfish, like a child still clinging to a moment that is lost?
Should I try again? she could be thinking the same things as me. Could I get a second chance, do I deserve a second chance?
These past few weeks have given me a lot time to think and I am slowly putting them into words. Though I still like Tasha I can now accept the fact that she may not. But still I must know, I don't know how she feels, but I still want to know. At the very least I want to know how she is going and most importantly, how she is coping. I am just hoping that maybe I am not alone, and that maybe she may be feeling the same thin, but I am also hoping she is coping with it a bit better than I am.
I guess what this whole post it really about is the fact that I am battling myself. One half wants to speak to Tasha so badly no matter what she say to me.
The other half want to get back to a sense of normality, either that or deep down that part is scared of rejection yet again.
We all long to be with another person. It will drive us to the extremes of our emotions, both the positive and the negative.
This post couldn't be more timely. It was brought upon by a conversation with a friend of mine
-------
[05:06:13 PM] (li)"If a Ta: do u still like her
[05:06:16 PM] (li)"If a Ta: it sounds like u do
[05:07:00 PM] Simmo - "YAY: In the end it doesn't matter if I still
like her, its wether she likes me anymore...
[05:07:29 PM] (li)"If a Ta: maybe ring her and ask in general chat is
she still single
[05:07:40 PM] (li)"If a Ta: and then ask if u can meet somewhere and
talk
[05:08:09 PM] Simmo - "YAY: makes sense seeing I haven't seen her since
last year
[05:08:28 PM] (li)"If a Ta: and if she is still available ask if she
wants
[05:08:40 PM] (li)"If a Ta: tor try again or your terms her and urs
[05:09:23 PM] Simmo - "YAY: yea, but i have put those chances to be
very low
[05:10:26 PM] (li)"If a Ta: u can only c
[05:10:26 PM] Simmo - "YAY: but then again, if i never try i will
never know, that is my philosophy, and there may be a
very small chance that she is thinking exactly the same
things as em
[05:10:28 PM] Simmo - "YAY: me
[05:11:23 PM] (li)"If a Ta: exactly
[05:11:37 PM] Simmo - "YAY: risk it all to gain it all
[05:12:30 PM] (li)"If a Ta: yep
[05:13:53 PM] Simmo - "YAY: It would still be awkward to talk to her.
and even if she doesnt want to talk, at least I may know
a bit about what she has been thinking the past few
months
[05:14:10 PM] (li)"If a Ta: u can only try and c wat she does
[05:14:38 PM] Simmo - "YAY: yea
-------
This post is also timely coz I may be seeing Tasha soon anyway. Bea's Party is finally this Saturday and since Tasha is one of her best friends she will probably be there. So wether I am ready or not I am going to be seeing and talking to Tasha this weekend. And that is why I want to ring her, to sort things out and know where I stand. And at the very least we would have more of an understanding of each other at the end of the conversation. That is unless she hangs up on me, but I don't think she will do that. The worst thing I could imagine at the moment would be to go to that party and Tasha doesn't speak to me, or even worst we would have a fight for some reason.
I am scared that whatever I say to Tasha, that I am going to make things worse for the both of us. But I have to try, for that is what I want to be; a person who tries and maybe someday I will win...
Also I am putting this post here because it is so sensitive, this post is one of the very examples of the reason why I made this password blog...
////simmo 10:40am
Is it wrong to still like her? or is it selfish, like a child still clinging to a moment that is lost?
Should I try again? she could be thinking the same things as me. Could I get a second chance, do I deserve a second chance?
These past few weeks have given me a lot time to think and I am slowly putting them into words. Though I still like Tasha I can now accept the fact that she may not. But still I must know, I don't know how she feels, but I still want to know. At the very least I want to know how she is going and most importantly, how she is coping. I am just hoping that maybe I am not alone, and that maybe she may be feeling the same thin, but I am also hoping she is coping with it a bit better than I am.
I guess what this whole post it really about is the fact that I am battling myself. One half wants to speak to Tasha so badly no matter what she say to me.
The other half want to get back to a sense of normality, either that or deep down that part is scared of rejection yet again.
We all long to be with another person. It will drive us to the extremes of our emotions, both the positive and the negative.
This post couldn't be more timely. It was brought upon by a conversation with a friend of mine
-------
[05:06:13 PM] (li)"If a Ta: do u still like her
[05:06:16 PM] (li)"If a Ta: it sounds like u do
[05:07:00 PM] Simmo - "YAY: In the end it doesn't matter if I still
like her, its wether she likes me anymore...
[05:07:29 PM] (li)"If a Ta: maybe ring her and ask in general chat is
she still single
[05:07:40 PM] (li)"If a Ta: and then ask if u can meet somewhere and
talk
[05:08:09 PM] Simmo - "YAY: makes sense seeing I haven't seen her since
last year
[05:08:28 PM] (li)"If a Ta: and if she is still available ask if she
wants
[05:08:40 PM] (li)"If a Ta: tor try again or your terms her and urs
[05:09:23 PM] Simmo - "YAY: yea, but i have put those chances to be
very low
[05:10:26 PM] (li)"If a Ta: u can only c
[05:10:26 PM] Simmo - "YAY: but then again, if i never try i will
never know, that is my philosophy, and there may be a
very small chance that she is thinking exactly the same
things as em
[05:10:28 PM] Simmo - "YAY: me
[05:11:23 PM] (li)"If a Ta: exactly
[05:11:37 PM] Simmo - "YAY: risk it all to gain it all
[05:12:30 PM] (li)"If a Ta: yep
[05:13:53 PM] Simmo - "YAY: It would still be awkward to talk to her.
and even if she doesnt want to talk, at least I may know
a bit about what she has been thinking the past few
months
[05:14:10 PM] (li)"If a Ta: u can only try and c wat she does
[05:14:38 PM] Simmo - "YAY: yea
-------
This post is also timely coz I may be seeing Tasha soon anyway. Bea's Party is finally this Saturday and since Tasha is one of her best friends she will probably be there. So wether I am ready or not I am going to be seeing and talking to Tasha this weekend. And that is why I want to ring her, to sort things out and know where I stand. And at the very least we would have more of an understanding of each other at the end of the conversation. That is unless she hangs up on me, but I don't think she will do that. The worst thing I could imagine at the moment would be to go to that party and Tasha doesn't speak to me, or even worst we would have a fight for some reason.
I am scared that whatever I say to Tasha, that I am going to make things worse for the both of us. But I have to try, for that is what I want to be; a person who tries and maybe someday I will win...
Also I am putting this post here because it is so sensitive, this post is one of the very examples of the reason why I made this password blog...
////simmo 10:40am
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