Wednesday, October 20, 2004
Well, it has been 4 weeks already. It has been a month and we still going strong. Cara and I are a very happy couple, and I am finally feeling how wonderful it is to be cared for.
I worry; I see that as my biggest fault. I worry I will loose her, I worry I am doing something wrong, I worry that I am boring. All normal things to worry about when in a relationship, and the great thing is that after talking these things through with Cara I find that I have nothing to worry about. She has the some of the same worries, and we show each other that the worries are false and overcome them together.
I am already becoming a better person as a result of her, my insecurities are slowly washing away, and a stronger more confident person is surfacing. This is the person I knew I could be, but had no way of reaching. I needed help, and now I have that help I am happy.
I never liked being depressed, but the light of optimism never dimmed. No matter how blurry my vision of happiness, I knew it was out there. My friends always told me that I will one day be with someone, and I thank them for being there for me, how could I doubt myself when they believed in me.
Now all my emotional thoughts have emptied I can talk about the happy weekends I have had with Cara.
Most of the weekends have been spent in Geelong, simply being around each other and talking; getting to know each other. And I see that she is a wonderful person, learning her personality, what she values in life, all of this increases my caring for her.
Then there is the kissing. Kissing her is wonderful, and on the first weekend I may have kissed too much. But who can blame me? For I have never experienced something so excitingly wonderful. The most reassuring part of kissing is the trust involved, knowing that she wants to kiss me as do I.
I have also seen her house, and her dog "Lucy". Ironic, as that is the name of my dog too :). We watched movies such as the butterfly effect, we share the same taste in movies, and that is wonderful.
Also been working, earning money long overdue. I now have a chance to be independent, to do what I want and be where I want to be.
This brings me to the most recent of weekends; The Geelong show and Donnie Darko.
Saturday was the Geelong show, I went to her house first to wait for her sister (Kirby) to get home before leaving as a group. We met up with others once we got there, the show was smaller than the Melbourne show, but I didn't mind as it resulted in less walking. We bought showbags and all manner of obscure trinkets. Then we went on rides together, we rode the scorpion together - twice. And later on we went on the Ferris Wheel, not as romantic as I had hoped, but still a great experience. The time spent with care flew by so quickly, and I was enjoyed every minute. I even won her a huge Fluffy Dice at one point to which one person in the group wished she had a boyfriend to win prizes for her too :D
As the night drew to a close the time for fireworks approached. We arrived with perfect timing and got a good spot in which to watch it. I haven't seen fireworks in so long, and they put on a great performance. We kissed often during that time and it was a very romantic and memorable moment, a spectacular end to the evening.
Sunday was interesting. Kirby, Cara and myself got the very early train (8am) into melbourne, to go to Village Cinemas Jam Factory in Chapel street. "Donnie Darko - The Directors Cut" was only on at 10:15am or 7pm, so we chose the earlier one. We got there with time to spare, and the movie was great. Donnie Darko really deserved the enhancements, it made the overall "Donnie Darko experience" more fulfilling. It finished unexpectedly late (12:30pm), we went shopping and I soon noticed that I had run out of money... Cara helped me buy lunch, and after that we headed for the train home. We missed the train by 5 minutes, so got the Werribee train home, and their parents gave them a lift home. Cara was noticeably in a bad mood, but as long as it wasn't because of me I was only mildly worried, and happy to be there to support her.
I am just happy that it is all working out so well, we seem to be well suited to each other and I look fo rward to even more happy times spent with her.
Williams party is soon and that is the perfect chance for her to meet my friends, I know Will and Ika are looking forward to seeing the woman that makes me so happy.
So now I am happy, school is almost over, I have a job, and I am seeing Cara again this weekend. I can't wait :)
-Simon
I worry; I see that as my biggest fault. I worry I will loose her, I worry I am doing something wrong, I worry that I am boring. All normal things to worry about when in a relationship, and the great thing is that after talking these things through with Cara I find that I have nothing to worry about. She has the some of the same worries, and we show each other that the worries are false and overcome them together.
I am already becoming a better person as a result of her, my insecurities are slowly washing away, and a stronger more confident person is surfacing. This is the person I knew I could be, but had no way of reaching. I needed help, and now I have that help I am happy.
I never liked being depressed, but the light of optimism never dimmed. No matter how blurry my vision of happiness, I knew it was out there. My friends always told me that I will one day be with someone, and I thank them for being there for me, how could I doubt myself when they believed in me.
Now all my emotional thoughts have emptied I can talk about the happy weekends I have had with Cara.
Most of the weekends have been spent in Geelong, simply being around each other and talking; getting to know each other. And I see that she is a wonderful person, learning her personality, what she values in life, all of this increases my caring for her.
Then there is the kissing. Kissing her is wonderful, and on the first weekend I may have kissed too much. But who can blame me? For I have never experienced something so excitingly wonderful. The most reassuring part of kissing is the trust involved, knowing that she wants to kiss me as do I.
I have also seen her house, and her dog "Lucy". Ironic, as that is the name of my dog too :). We watched movies such as the butterfly effect, we share the same taste in movies, and that is wonderful.
Also been working, earning money long overdue. I now have a chance to be independent, to do what I want and be where I want to be.
This brings me to the most recent of weekends; The Geelong show and Donnie Darko.
Saturday was the Geelong show, I went to her house first to wait for her sister (Kirby) to get home before leaving as a group. We met up with others once we got there, the show was smaller than the Melbourne show, but I didn't mind as it resulted in less walking. We bought showbags and all manner of obscure trinkets. Then we went on rides together, we rode the scorpion together - twice. And later on we went on the Ferris Wheel, not as romantic as I had hoped, but still a great experience. The time spent with care flew by so quickly, and I was enjoyed every minute. I even won her a huge Fluffy Dice at one point to which one person in the group wished she had a boyfriend to win prizes for her too :D
As the night drew to a close the time for fireworks approached. We arrived with perfect timing and got a good spot in which to watch it. I haven't seen fireworks in so long, and they put on a great performance. We kissed often during that time and it was a very romantic and memorable moment, a spectacular end to the evening.
Sunday was interesting. Kirby, Cara and myself got the very early train (8am) into melbourne, to go to Village Cinemas Jam Factory in Chapel street. "Donnie Darko - The Directors Cut" was only on at 10:15am or 7pm, so we chose the earlier one. We got there with time to spare, and the movie was great. Donnie Darko really deserved the enhancements, it made the overall "Donnie Darko experience" more fulfilling. It finished unexpectedly late (12:30pm), we went shopping and I soon noticed that I had run out of money... Cara helped me buy lunch, and after that we headed for the train home. We missed the train by 5 minutes, so got the Werribee train home, and their parents gave them a lift home. Cara was noticeably in a bad mood, but as long as it wasn't because of me I was only mildly worried, and happy to be there to support her.
I am just happy that it is all working out so well, we seem to be well suited to each other and I look fo rward to even more happy times spent with her.
Williams party is soon and that is the perfect chance for her to meet my friends, I know Will and Ika are looking forward to seeing the woman that makes me so happy.
So now I am happy, school is almost over, I have a job, and I am seeing Cara again this weekend. I can't wait :)
-Simon
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